Sunday, November 19, 2006
im back after three days and two nights at pasir ris. before that, met up with ashraf, and he had to go for last-minute werk again. was actually pissed at first, when will i ever have quality time with him again? i always had during skul times. now? not anymore uh. den met with nazirah before going to pasir ris. lepak2, talk2.. den went to Dewan to meet up with her boi. and this guy came to me & sat bside me. asked me alot of bonus questions. he's kind of a joker, but i dont think i can really entertain this type of guys la. my first impression was that he effing looks like a playboy. okay nevermind. omfg, what was i thinking? i already have Ashraf, why should i think of Ihsan? because, these few days, we've been quarelling over and over again about nothing at all. sometimes, he's the one who started it first. and lately, i've been the one who started it. i dont know, but i feel uneasy. like he wants to avoid me. when i called him on his handphone, he didnt pick up. i swear, i called him a million times. but when i called his home, he's there. i dont know, but i felt like he was avoiding me. and we're supposed to meet today, and he cancelled it.
said there wasnt enough time. then why should he even planned it the night before? called him up yesterday using my brother's fone at nite, thought wanted to chat. but he told me he wanted to sleep. huh, so much for my efforts of stealing the fone from my brother's room. i felt like a million dollars when i met you. but now, i think i've went bankrupt. why must we show attitude to each other? i hate it alot, but i hope all this misunderstandings would stop. this thursday's gonna be two months knowing you. dont let it be a torture for me please. just that if you wanna avoid me, do it quick. and dont just leave me like that. my heart's had enough of getting hurt.
Ashraf, i love you. and it's real love that you dont know about. im so lucky to have you by my side. your love for me is more than enough. just don't leave me. please, know that i love you just the way you are. :(
im sick. i shouldnt think too much. im prepared to accept the truth. just count on me for life.
